Getting that Sexy Back one step at a time

I feel ever so slightly sexier today.  It's the oddest thing, I'm in workout clothes, after workout hair and NO make-up, but I feel sexier.  Simple flirty exchanges with the man at the grocery store, Pep Boys, etc.  Just a little extra something in my step today.  Not sure if it's my self-confidence popping it's head out today or what, but I feel slightly different today.  I never would have felt sexy, exposed, without a hint of makeup.... Today, I didn't care.  I forgot I didn't have make-up and when I remembered, I didn't care!  Wow, what is that?  It must be the Zumba talking!

Yesterday, I made a very tough and very personal decision about my life and how I would for the first time, make the tough decision.  I feel confident for this choice and am proud at how it has turned out.  Making the right life decision is not always easy.  I think that this contest has given me the confidence to believe in myself and know that I deserve better.  I know what I want and what I feel I am missing in life, but I am not going to be clouded by the illusion or tease of a dream.  Instead, I'm going to wait for the real thing to smack me right in the face.  No more of this pretending that these moments won't affect me or guide me off track.  In fact, these are the worst paths for me to follow.  These tracks don't have a destination I want, or worse, these tracks are heading in the opposite direction of where my heart wants to be.  I feel so self assured that I'm making the ME decisions right now and these ME decisions will guide me home in the end. 
As much as it hurts to know that a chapter that I've wanted for so long, might be closing, I have to come to the understanding that the actual chapter was filled with possible hurt, heartache and a dream only shared by one.  Goodbye, you've been the anchor, the devil, the spark I needed.  My journey we traveled together was all my heart could bear, and you were there every time and every way I needed.  But I can't travel with you any longer, I need to call it what it was.  I will forever cherish all  you symbolize in my life and I wish things could be different.  My heart, helped to heal and yet break at the same time. 
Time to move on.  Time to know more is out there.  No looking back.  I've got that sexy to get back, I can't wait around.